Week 23. Just one more to go in this amazing experience. I’m excited and sad and have already decided to do everything I can to keep taking this class. I feel and know I still have so much to learn, to exercise, to implement, and above all to manifest. And the lesson this week was, as always, so timely and spot on for where I am.
Haanel says we cannot reach perfection in six months, it is the labor for life, and that encourages me so much. I have already decided to start w lesson one after the class finishes Bc I so need all the wonderful wisdom.
The idea that thought is creative, success is an effect not a cause, and that I must keep up my mental diet, and focus as much as possible on what I want is just so important for me. I am absorbing it all more and more, and I want it to become more and more part of me, my subconscious. It has been, but I want it to go even deeper.
I feel in a way I have been spending far too much time thinking of sorrow, loss and discord. And reaping results. Even while wonderful things like the birth of my son, getting married or my mom getting a pacemaker are happening. Not 4 months after my baby’s birth the landlord of our rental house cancelled our lease even though we had signed an 18 month contract Bc they wanted to sell it. I was so sad Bc I loved the rental house, I had given birth in it (a big dream come true, and one I was envisioning during my first MKE experience!) and kept feeling sad, sowing sorrow and reaping it ultimately. For different reasons we ended up buying the house, miraculously, but also were treated terribly by both our realtor and the landlord/seller. We allowed both to take advantage of us, neither were fair to us, and we still stayed. I still love the house for various reasons, but I still get sad when I think of the whole transaction. Though it’s getting better thanks to the mental diet and the work I’ve been doing. I just wish at the time I was more able to apply all the knowledge of this class, but somehow I didn’t. I know I was terribly exhausted and overwhelmed, not sleeping enough w everything going on. And then, literally the day after we closed, a contractor who came by himself highly likely stole my beloved engagement ring out of my bedside table, where I had foolishly stored it, while not wearing it to protect my baby from accidentally scratching him with it. I foolishly never thought anything like it could happen. I know I never moved either of my two rings, there wasn’t a break-in, no neighborhood thefts had been reported. It could have only been him and I had had a weird feeling when this guy came before with the big crew to work on a leak shortly before this day. Thankfully he left me the wedding ring, so I have something to put on my finger…I just wish so much he would return the ring. He never responded to calls by police and was fired from the restoration company shortly after the theft.
I share all this Bc in my heart I so believe that my sadness and thoughts of sorrow helped bring these losses or outward conditions on. Now if only I can do the opposite – and bring the ring back w positive thoughts 🙂
But even here I am encouraged by the law of compensation and hope one day there will be compensation for all this…
that said, my goal now is to be more positive as the day we have to fly home and away from my mom is drawing closer. Such a bummer, to go back to being far away from her…while I miss my husband and friends, and while I’m so tired from all the work here, it’s been such a gift. One that I will be forever grateful for.