Category Archives: Master Key

Week 12 – Green grass grows

This has been another very stressful week. The readings and exercises have become an anchor in addition to a lifeline. I find myself craving them, even if I am not perfect at them, still.

I do feel some change in me. Although I am still quite worried about my mom, pray for her, use the wonderful affirmation, and hope to visit her in the new year, I have more desire to redecorate our house – not just in terms of shapes but in general, to the point I actually took action in our kitchen this week. This is a miracle to me bc I’ve been wanting to start it for some time. I didn’t even do much but enough to make me feel happier every time I’m in the kitchen now. It’s not a big kitchen, but I use it a lot as I cook most meals, and from scratch. And it’s inspired me to do more, yay!

I also love seeing the shapes around the house. I’ve been really drawn to them this week, probably because I need them so much. I want to put up more – with my own writings on them, other than the goals….I love passing them by. And because I walk around a lot in our house, it’s so good to have these written reminders.

I didn’t get much sleep this week because my son got a cold and had trouble sleeping, so I did too. And i’m already sleep deprived, ha. Sadly the bad fatigue didn’t help me be kind to my son when he used a pen to paint all over my favorite chair….and I yelled at him. Ugh. I did make me want to do the exercises even more….

On the cool happenings front, I received some precious, unexpected gifts this week. A friend offered to watch our son while my hubby and I went to his work Christmas party – first time we were away from him at night. He did really well. And I ‘won’ an essential oil blend that I love in a little raffle on Facebook – and I never win anything, LOL. (To the contrary – I have lost a bunch of things in the last couple years, most significantly, my engagement was stolen, I strongly believe by a contractor we hired but never got it back). To the next person this may not be much, but I celebrated these precious gifts. I am indeed in the dynamic flow of giving and receiving! šŸ™‚ and green grass is growing at the end of the desert, indeed. Good night!

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Week 11-In spite of the sting of the blade

We are in Scroll 3 of the Greatest Salesman this month and I am quite inspired by the words of the picture in the beginning of the chapter specifically…about the courage a bull being assessed by how many times he’s willing to be pricked with the lance – similar to us.

I’ve sure felt pricked a lot this fall….and before too, but especially this fall, because I guess my mom’s struggles affect me more than other things, because I love her so much. That and the fact that I’m so far away, and can’t easily visit her as I did when she was younger and I wasn’t a mom myself yet. And because it’s the holiday/Christmas season now, it’s even harder to think that she is alone. And I’ve had a big realization that I’m addicted to sadness – my peptides, anyway. I’ve found myself wishing this week that my mom was younger, stronger, in less pain, with a stronger immune system and body, even able to travel here – as she did when she was younger. Of course it’s silly in a way because I can’t turn back time. But I can pray for her, and I can keep saying that wonderful phrase “My mom is whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy”. And I can call her, or let her call me….which she is doing, though also less than she used to. But she loves to hear my son’s voice, speaking to her in either German or English, as he’s adding words in both languages, and so I try to focus on the things to be thankful for.

I love Og’s reminder in this scroll of how the rewards of our journey may come at the end, not the beginning, and so I’m encouraged to persist. On this front, and some others in my life. I did complete a big project I started some months ago, and it felt great to complete it. A relief that will open up more time for other things like my daily exercises and pursuing my DMP.

I also enrolled my little boy in his very first little class, away from me, 90 minutes twice a week. And he surprised me with how well he did – never cried, just focused on playing with the kids, and toys like musical instruments and dinosaurs. Like me, he started out shy, but the second day, the teacher said he did speak :). Someone is definitely growing up….

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Week 10 – The 7 minute mental diet

It’s week 10 and I’m a day late with my blog. I couldn’t log into my account last night when trying to write…I tried for an hour. I realize now I should have just given up after 15 minutes because the problem was I wasn’t logging on with the correct login-screen (I have one for my business and one for the masterkey).

In a way I’m not surprised considering the rough week it’s been. Still quite preoccupied with my mom, trying to help her long distance by arranging help with shopping, which is not easy bc my mom doesn’t like to be a bother – though she really isn’t – but I finally managed to get her to tell me what she needed. Still so weak and discouraged but pushing herself. She really seems to want to be alone a lot, which breaks my heart. I had bad anxiety this week, and I kept saying the wonderful affirmation “My mom is whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy.” And due to some wonderful commenting on my blog last week, I feel better and better about saying it FOR her. I also felt a deep sadness all week, as I was thinking about how my mom has become weaker and weaker over this past year, and less and less wanting to even talk on the phone with me. And we used to talk an hour daily, without issues, and she’d tell me whatever she did that day, what parts of Berlin she rode through on the bus. Many times I’d come home and there’d be a message from her on the answering machine (we still have a landline). We still chat almost daily now, just a lot shorter, and I’m never really ready to stop when she is already. šŸ™

So I realized this week, how badly I have been at the 7 DAY mental diet. I can barely manage seven minutes!! Hence the title for this blog post. I will keep starting over…I know one day I’ll be better.

In other ‘news’, this week I also started seeing a deeper shift away from older habits and into new ones that support my health – even simple ones like drinking enough water again (a struggle since I became a mom), eating a real lunch (not just snacks); true health is one of my PPNs. I am also craving the readings and exercises much more – perhaps because the situation with my mom is so hard for me – and they continue to be a lifeline. This week I realized I need to rethink some of my routines, especially in the morning and evening, so I can have more structured/set times for doing my readings/rehearsing. Friday morning was the best morning I had in terms of having a little quiet time, without being interrupted by my family, and my whole day looked different because of it. I am not good at taking time for me yet, ever since my son was born. I am changing that though, slowly but surely.

Thanks so much for reading.

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Week 9 – Frederick Andrews’ affirmation

This was another rough week and once again I am worried about my mom. She’s home but still needs time to regain some strength and her sleeps has been hard…and her medicine needs adjusting as well. My worry is about her being discouraged, feeling lonely and not really wanting help, still, because she doesn’t want to be a burden. I do need to pray more and trust God to strengthen her.

Thankfully, this week’s MK reading is another wonderful one, as always so much treasure to be found in each key. The ones that touched me most were the ones sharing the story about Frederick Andrews, and his affirmation that goes like this:

“I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy”.

I have said it many times this week, and will continue to, first thing in the morning and last thing at night…I know it by heart by now, though I quite often would say “I am whole, perfect, strong….” though I’m getting better at the perfect being the second word.

One thing I hope and pray so much is that Frederick and/or Haanel are right when they say that this wonderful sentence also works when we say it for other people, and so I am wanting to say it for my mom.

Have you said this sentence to yourself? If so I’d love to hear about your experience!!

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Week 8 – The Gal Staring Back

This has been one of the scariest weeks of my life. My mom had to go to the hospital, first time since my birth, and I was never so scared for her before. My mom does not like a fuss made about her, or accept help, or trust in doctors much. She has a big spirit and in her 20s she once escaped the hospital while there for a party – jumping out of a window!

But the hospital was 100% what she needed, and without going into further details, I know she appreciated everyone’s help – even if she couldn’t wait to go home. She is older and at first when she started to improve she was actually mad that I called for help for her. But I knew all along it was the right thing. I was anxious at first, when I called for help, but deep down, I knew it had to be done. Even if she didn’t like it, or me, for doing so.

My mom is a true warrior. She had a tough youth, lost her mom at age 7 to puerperal fever after childbirth, and her dad died behind the Berlin Wall of cancer in his 70s, and she didn’t see him much in his last years. Other tragedy touched her but she always moved on, always listening to her heart and inner voice. She doesn’t understand all the science we are learning in class, but she knows what is best for her, when she’s not so sick she can’t get out of bed to answer the door. Or the phone.

When she left the hospital, the staff told her no cab would take her home bc she had no money on her – when she was picked up by the emergency services, she had no chance to take a thing with her. And when I offered to organize for someone to bring her some things, and her wallet and purse, she vehemently refused. She happened to find some change in her jacket pocket and took a bus home. I am so sad the hospital told her this, because I know a cab driver would have walked her up to her place, in exchange for a nice tip for the extra service and the ride home. I know bc I’ve asked for similar help before. Instead, she walked home the block and a half from the bus stop. Because she was still weak, she took a long time. Once home she left a voicemail for me saying “so you see it worked” (I was very adamant about arranging help and money from here, all of which she rejected). No doubt I was more upset about it than she was, though she was to a degree too, because she didn’t even have a cellphone to call a cab for herself. The cool part is, her neighbor ran into her at the corner and helped her all the way back home to her apartment.

I am still worried for her as she really needs to accept help at home, she is getting older and less able to move around and I hope and pray with some time and several people ‘working’ on her she will come around.

No matter what, my mom is my biggest example of the gal in the glass…she has never cheated herself, and she can look herself straight in the eye. And more and more, so am I. God knows I wish I was in Germany right now and could give her a hug, or make her a meal. Or do anything else that might help….

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Week 7 – Visualizing the positive

So we’re already in week 7 and the Master Key is helping me refine my vision of my life. Trouble is, right now I am worried about my dear elderly mom, who lives alone in Germany and who most likely has a kidney infection that she was just a bladder infection.

She’s been there for over a decade and I have worried about her before but today it’s harder because she said she was too weak to see a doctor but, true to her very independent nature, did not want me to send one over to her.

So now it’s the near the usual end of my evening but tonight I am struggling badly with anxiety; so much it’s hard to envision anything or read much of my homework.

I am trying so hard though to envision her lying in bed (it’s the middle of the night there) and resting and healing and waking up this morning, able to get out on her own, getting ready and taking a cab to the doctor’s office. OH how I dream of her middle of the night wake up where she’d call me or let the phone ring here to let me know she’s up and about for a minute to pee. She’s done it in the past….

Wednesday is usually when I create my blog post and I am struggling to come up with anything more inspiring to say. I am so sorry to anyone for reading this….but if you did, thank you!!

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Week 4 – Seek the Silence Frequently

This week I feel so comforted by the encouragement to ‘seek the silence frequently’ in the MK lesson. No doubt it has to do with having been with a super active toddler without my husband available to help me for several weeks now, and there has been little time to be in stillness, outside of when my toddler is resting, either in bed or in the stroller if we are out and about.

Not having TV on is no issue at all – I don’t miss a thing. Silence has never been so precious to me as it has in the last couple years, most likely because I experience it rarely :). Only now I am also enjoying the wonderful exercises during the daily “sit”, and while it’s been harder this week as I got a cold and cough which I can’t often stop right now, getting back to the daily practice of it has been so helpful. My thoughts have definitely been much more scattered, rather than focused, let alone controlled. That is the second ‘thing’ I feel so compelled to pursue this week, besides the seeking of silence.

I want to share a quote from the Master Key because my heart resonates with it so much:

“Over-work or over-play or over-bodily activity of any kind produces conditions of mental apathy and stagnation which makes it impossible to do the more important work which results in a realization of conscious power. We should, therefore, See the Silence frequently. Power comes through repose, it is in the silence that we can be still, and when we are still, we can think and thought is the secret of all attainment.” (4-25)

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Week 2 – The Watchman at the Gate

I am so lovingĀ the teachings in this class. I need them, and maybe that is why. In some ways I feel like I have forgotten so much, and in others it feels like riding I haven’t ridden in a while.

This week, the idea of the conscious being the watchman of the gate, the protector of the subconscious, was really driven home to me, once more. I love the clarity of the distinction between the sub- and the conscious: the conscious directs and guards subconscious, and this can reverse conditions in my life. Wow. The subconscious “perceives by intuition”, is fast, and proves nothing. It just accepts what it’s fed by our conscious mind. This is so key for me because I need to remember to watch what thoughts I allow into my head….focus on truth, on the positive – not erroneous thoughts. I need to employ my watchman, my conscious mind.

This is so key because the subconscious is where my power is, and if it’s not running the right program, I can’t be successful. And because the subconscious never rests or sleeps, just like the blood or the heart, I need to make sure it’s running the right programs…

This is why I so much love the encouragement of the MKMMA to keep up with the exercises, so I can rebuild my conscious mind where my thinking is faulty, to create new, healthy habits, to think for myself, to not accept what others want me to think or do, but to truly connect with the deepest part of me and live from THERE, because that is where my power lies.

The subconscious is so amazing….this week the MK mentioned too how our subby preserves our life, restores our health….and helps us take care of our offspring – which fascinated me since I now have thatĀ great gift and I have been amazed at how much I have needed to rely on my intuition, because in parenting my first child, it seems like each day something new is happening, and I often have no clue what to do – I simply do what my heart seems to lead me to do.

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Week 1 – Back in the Saddle

So it’s week one and I am traveling this week and had to miss the first webinar because I had no wifi access šŸ™ but I am so excited to start reading the Masterkey and Og’s amazing words and the BPB and everything else in this wonderful class.Ā I can’t wait to go through this most amazing of classes once more. I took it before and had the great gift of a baby since and have definitely fallen off the wagon…..not making time for me, to meditate, to look into the world within, to really leverage the subconscious, and this summer my mind kept coming back to the MKMMA when I did have a quiet moment and I was thinking of what I could do for myself that would be inspiring and help me grow.

I grew and learned so much last time, I deeply desire to get back in the saddle. I had dreamed of becoming a mom – well, since I was three, basically – but life and some health issues which ate up some precious years of my life and delayed that dream. While there is nothing I enjoy more in life than watching this miracle grow up – I also still deeply desire to grow within myself, to transformĀ my weaknesses into strengths, so I can become a better mom, wife, woman, friend, contributor. And God knows there are lots of challenges to master in this life. And certainly, to not lose myself in doing so much for others – even though I enjoy it deeply. Staying true to myself, making time for me and connecting to my heart are so important to me, and even my body and mind! There is so much to learfile2871273526205n still about my subconscious, my dharma, about who I am. Sometimes I feel like I should already know it all, but I don’t. And I’m learning to be OK with that.

I am also super looking forward to masterminding with others in the group – besidesĀ getting to hear the wonderful wisdom throughout the course I also totally love knowing there are hundreds of others on this special journey with me, all over the world. And I get to witness it. So without further ado, here we go…. šŸ™‚

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Week 6 – The Power of our Brain

I love this week. I am also continuing to be challenged by this week. Challenged, inspired, motivated. Challenged because I feel so busy, so attached to ‘stuff’ in our house (meaning both material items I’ve beenĀ working on reducing and just regular work that needs to get done, while watching my very active, adorable toddler) that it is so wonderful to be reminded again and again throughout this course of how important our brain is to our life, the cause to all the effects we experience in our external circumstances – and especially this week.

That and the power of concentration, with it being the very highest accomplishment that can be acquired.

My ability to concentrate has suffered a bit lately, as I feel pulled in many directions in my life via the roles I play, wife, mom, homemaker, part-time business owner, so much that it’s a challenge to take time for myself, where I am not actually accomplishing anything, but just being. This is why i love the sitting quietly time so much. I need and crave it. And I notice how much my mind wanders, except for the moments I focus on my breath, or attempt to do the different exercises we are instructed to do.

I am so thankful, however, for all we are learning and doing in the MKMMA and the cool thing is, I am seeing fun “results”. I got to check off a lot of things on my to do list – not just our chore card šŸ™‚ – and some cool things are happening, such as totally surprise gifts, surprise energy levels and the letting go of some pressure at home to have everything needing to be or look perfect before I enjoy being with my toddler more and outside in great weather this week. In a word, I have felt freer the second part of this week than I have in some time. Woohoo!

The only ‘bummer’ is is I have realized my DMP is still far from done…to the point of my need to change one of my PPNs. But I am getting there…..

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